for @doggonemad

[throughbamboo]

just bros being bros

Comments

[doggonemad]

[ fuck. goddamnit. he's never been able to deny his bro anything. so if he says he wants to know . . .

every muscle in his body tenses up at that as he closes his eye, trying to think of how to explain, where exactly to even begin. it began in the hole, but it didn't end there. ]

Fuck. Okay.

[throughbamboo]

[he can tell, already, that he's about to hear something that will make his blood boil. Though if he's being honest, it started doing that the moment he felt the scars on his bro's back.

He nods, but he stays quiet, waiting]

[doggonemad]

. . .

After I lost my eye, Shimano had me thrown into the Hole.

[throughbamboo]

[oh.

His hand stops, but it stays resting against his back as Saejima leans back a bit to see him better, eyes widening]

[doggonemad]

[ he keeps his eye closed and his voice level as he continues. ]

He kept me there for a year.

[throughbamboo]

[he was going to keep quiet so Majima could get through it without interruption, but haha no]

A year?

[doggonemad]

'bout that long, yeah. So that's where the bulk of what yer feelin' came from.

[throughbamboo]

[the more he learns about what happened back then, the worse it gets.

And this? This is the worst of it]

Fuck, bro . . .

[doggonemad]

[ the less he says, the better. the scars on his back tell enough of the story; he doesn't need to go into detail. ]

Yeah.

[throughbamboo]

[he feels so much anger, but there's nowhere to put it. And that just makes him even more angry.

His hand moves across his back, practically gentle in contrast to what he growls out]

I'd fuckin' kill 'im if he weren't already dead.

[doggonemad]

[ haha it gets worse haha. ]

He's dead an' gone, bro.

[throughbamboo]

[he's gonna PISS ON HIS GRAVE.

But some of the anger briefly deflates out of him]

Good fuckin' riddance.

[doggonemad]

[ cracks his eye open a bit. ]

This is why I didn't wanna tell ya.

[throughbamboo]

'Cuz I'd get angry?

[doggonemad]

Yeah. An' it don't matter now. Everyone who pulled that shit on me over the years is long dead an' gone.

[throughbamboo]

. . .

[his fingers deliberately touch a more scarred part of his back]

I'd get angry no matter what ya told me, bro. Tellin' me just tells me where t'send it.

[doggonemad]

They're all dead. I fuckin' torched the Hole myself.

[throughbamboo]

Ya did? Good.

[doggonemad]

Mm. It's all done with.

[throughbamboo]

Good.

[said a little quieter. He thinks for a moment, then]

. . . I won't ask ya to get into it. I wanna know, but that part's for whenever you feel like tellin' it, if ya ever do.

[doggonemad]

. . .

I think yer pretty good at readin' between the lines, bro.

[throughbamboo]

Yeah . . . I am.

[and even then, he probably still can't imagine the worst.

Fuck]

[doggonemad]

[ should i tell him about sagawa . . .

nahhhhh. ]

So. That's about it.

[throughbamboo]

Mmn.

Ya've been through a lot.

[doggonemad]

Ain't no more'n you've been through.